"I'll just do one drink!"

Lmao! We have all said it and we have all regretted it! I can't help but remember the movie "Old School" with Will Ferrell in which they are middle-aged men who decide to open a frat house by the college campus. In the scene, these college kids convince Frank (Will Ferrell) to do a beer funnel. He utters the phrase, "I'll just do one!". And that's all it took to activate Frank the Tank! Are you a Frank the Tank? I'm not, but my wife is! All it takes is one double shot of Tito's Vodka with Tonic and lookout! It amazes me how some people, when they drink, get very energetic. Like alcohol is an energy booster for them, and they can stay up all night and drink. Me, not so much. Depending on the duration or atmosphere of the party, I'm good for a twelve or eighteen-pack of Corona or Modelo. But depending also on the crowd or vibe, it can be a one beer and out situation. You know what I'm talking about. People can definitely affect your drinking mood. Also, for me, music plays a role as well. If the music is bad or just all over the place, that will just force me to check out real fast.

Now, in my experience, this "I just do one drink" happens in many different situations. You can visit a friend's house to pick something up, and he or she hits you with "Stay for a quick drink." Next thing you know, your wife is wondering why you Ubered home when you were supposed to pick up a ladder your buddy borrowed a year ago. Or you are at a friend's house eating dinner. You finish eating, and they hit you with "Night Cap Anyone?" Next thing you know, the margarita machine comes out, you're next in line for karaoke, singing Journey's "Don't Stop Believing." Uber again to the rescue. Then you have the most common and popular time, "Hey, we are meeting up after work, you coming?" This situation is a motherf@#ker, and of course, you go. "Yeah, I will go and have a drink." Next thing you know, it's 3 am, a hundred missed calls from your spouse, and you have to be at work in 4 hours. FML! Oh yeah! We have all been there. But I tell you what, they can be some of the best experiences you have. It can be really interesting when you are at work the next day. Good times, lol.

Recently, I have really gotten into microbreweries and different types of beer. I have never been this way before, but I have been lately. Every time we go on vacation, I like to hit up the local breweries. I also got into whiskey. I never realized there were so many different types: Bourbon, Scotch, Rye, Irish, Japanese, Canadian, etc. You can spend a few hours at Total Wine and Spirits checking all the whiskey they have. But I can't drink both whiskey and beer at the same time. If I'm drinking beer, I have to stick with it. If I add liquor, I'll for sure vomit when I get home. If I start with whiskey and move to beer, I'm fine. It's like that saying, "Liquor before beer, you're in the clear; beer before liquor, never sicker." That's how it is with me. Maybe it's because I got old. Drinking in my 40s is a lot different than when I was in my 20s.

The Hangover! Seriously, when you are older, hangovers are the worst! F@#k, man! When you drink in your 40s, you have to prepare for the hangover. Even then, you are going to be f@#ked up. Dehydration is the worst, and I usually have some Liquid IV or the adult Pedialyte you get at 7/11 at the house. Also, pita chips because that is the only thing I can eat without vomiting. Then there is the migraine headache. That sucks so bad. I don't know what is worse, the headache or the nausea. Also, the body aches are brutal. Most likely not from the alcohol but from the fact that the night before you were trying to be that younger 20-year-old version of yourself but forgot you were 40 with bad knees. F@#k you, Father Time! It takes me at least two to three days to recover now. It sucks really bad too. But I do it every weekend, so it's just kind of routine now. Lol. I remember when I was in my 20s. I would get trashed, get up the next day, run three miles, go to the gym, work 8 hours, and still go out that night. Do it all over again. No problem! I was definitely a party animal. Now I'm just an old fart who is in bed by 9 pm.

But I bet I can outdrink most people for sure. I can definitely drink more beers in an hour than most people. A 6-pack or a pitcher of beer, gone in sixty minutes or less. I am a champ! I love draft beers. There's something about the frosty cold mug and ice-cold beer. They go down smooth and fast. Lol. I drive when I take my wife out to dinner, but by the time we are done, she is the one with the car keys. "Love you, babe!" *Burp!*